If they paid him in hundred dollar bills, then the $13 million dollars the Yankees intend to spend on CC Sabathia over 6 months would weigh less than him.
As such, I propose a new unit of currency: the CC Sabathia coin. It would be worth $25 million dollars, weigh 290 pounds and be made out of gold-plated pork roast.
Monday, November 24, 2008
Friday, November 21, 2008
Vespa Scooters
Compared to cars, Vespa Scooters are incredibly fuel efficient vehicles. That is because they are significantly lighter. You know what else they are significantly lighter than? CC Sabathia.
I wonder what would happen if CC tried to ride a Vespa scooter: Would it still get good gas mileage? Would he find it difficult to balance himself on it? Would it be crushed into a pile of scrap metal?
I wonder how many miles per gallon CC Sabathia gets?
I wonder what would happen if CC tried to ride a Vespa scooter: Would it still get good gas mileage? Would he find it difficult to balance himself on it? Would it be crushed into a pile of scrap metal?
I wonder how many miles per gallon CC Sabathia gets?
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Post-Presidential William Howard Taft
William Howard Taft, the fattest president in the history of the United States, weighed less than CC Sabathia when he left office. Clocking in at over 300 pounds at his heaviest, Taft famously had a special bath tub installed in the White House so he could fit into it with the team of 3 small Asian women that he employed to clean his various folds and crevices.
After he left office, however, he lost 80 pounds in an effort to treat his sleep apnea, making him lighter than CC Sabathia. He did not, however, receive a contract from the Yankees at this point.
After he left office, however, he lost 80 pounds in an effort to treat his sleep apnea, making him lighter than CC Sabathia. He did not, however, receive a contract from the Yankees at this point.
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